Positive Parenting Principles Explained - 98thPercentile

The parenting phase is such a new experience for all. Every day we learn new things and solve issues we didn’t even know existed! But then that is the beauty of it. After all, what is life without a little chaos? 

But you must make sure that chaotic situations do not go out of hand. And for that, some basic principles of parenting are to be followed. Broadly spoken, parenting is all about taking care of your child in a way where they learn good values and learn to survive. 

It’s all about teaching your kids the difference between right and wrong, how to become a kind human being, and look out for their physical and mental welfare. Many people have come up with various theories based on the principles of positive parenting. Let’s check out some 

Dr. Conte’s 4 C’s of positive parenting

Out of the many theories and principles of positive parenting, we found this one the simplest and easiest to follow while covering most of the parenting concerns. It is some old hacks that people have followed for a long time but expressed more coherently.

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Let’s know more choices

Children should be allowed to make choices. Earlier during the traditional way of parenting, children were not given any opportunity to choose for themselves. But now it is recommended that kids should be able to express themselves and be allowed to make certain choices.

Consequences 

Children must know the consequences of their actions. Some may reward them and some may punish them. Kids tend to not repeat actions that have negative consequences. So, it must be communicated well to them by the parents.  

Consistency 

The parents must be consistent. In the parenting phase, you can sometimes forget to fulfill your promises made to children. This makes you lose credibility in front of them and if repeated they stop trusting you together. Make sure to keep your word and be consistent so that your child learns it too.  

Compassion 

Being compassionate is a life skill and must be taught to children. But how? As we know, children learn from seeing us and imitate what we are doing. Hence, show compassion to your kids and help them learn this very important and rare value. Teach them to be compassionate to people who deserve it.

Steinberg’s 10 parenting principles

Here some do’s and don’ts are mentioned for the parents- 

• Explain your major decisions to your child. 
• Allow your child to make small choices. 
• Stop being overly protective and loving. 
• Efforts and behavior must be consistent. 
• Set boundaries and have clear rules to follow. 
• Don’t be too rigid and resort to strict punishments. 
• Treat your child with respect. 
• Modify your parenting technique according to the digital era and your child. 
• Make sure to be a role model for your child. 
•  Give more time to your child and be more involved. 

3 C’s of parenting 

Focus on consistency, care, and communication when it comes to parenting. With time we need to change our parenting techniques and be in tandem with the ever-changing world.  

Consistency

Your actions towards your child must be consistent. The efforts you put in, the conversations you have, and the time you spend together must not be inconsistent and leave your child confused.

Care

Show your child that you care. They must be aware of the efforts you make for them and see care in your actions. They must know that they are in a safe space where they will be loved and cared for no matter what.

Communication

Communicate with your child as much as possible. This will help you to know more about them and their thoughts. Also, communication solves many issues and clears major misunderstandings.

7 rules for good parenting

Therapists like Blake Griffin Edwards believe that there are 7 tips for good parenting. Love without conditions and teach them the same.

• Communicate your expectations clearly without being too uptight. 
• Praise your child when they do something good. 
• Do not react when they throw a tantrum or do something wrong. Try to be patient. Similarly, show connection emotionally and make them know that you are always available for them when they do good. 
• Promote real playtime rather than spending time on digital media. 
• Encourage children to feel things and tell them expressing emotions is okay. Also, discourage them from being gloomy. 
• Provide your child with insight and teach them about the world and its ways. Tell them that internal beauty is more important than external charm. 

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The Hoover-Dempsey and Sandler model 

This model focuses on the learning of children and the involvement of parents in it. It categorizes the involvement of parents through either of the following- 

• Encouragement- where you teach children by encouraging them to learn good values. 
• Modeling- where you become a role model for your child. 
• Reinforcement-where you make your child do the same thing again and again till they learn. 
• Instruction- where you teach them by instructing them and giving clear directives. 
• It also focuses on the academic and social self-efficacy of children related to learning. 

If we have these basic theories and principles in mind, we can ace the parenting phase. There will be mistakes but we will emerge victorious by learning from them. 

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